When thinking about your relationships with friends, family, significant other, employer, and so on, do you consider trust to be a large factor in maintaining that relationship? Would you maintain a friendship with someone that you can’t trust? We value trust; our trust in others and their trust in us. However, how often do we think about the trust our dogs have in us?

Often times we don’t think about our dogs trusting us, instead we base our expectations of them on the notion that our dogs do things because they want to please us. That couldn’t be further from the truth. Our dogs are not out to dominate us and they don’t do things out of spite. The truth is, dogs are animals and they do things that benefit them. There can be a mutual benefit involved; they do what you ask and they receive a reward. It’s a win-win.

Building your dog’s trust in you and maintaining it is rather easy and rewarding. Here are a few things to remember.

• Be kind. Screaming at your dog isn’t going to get you anywhere. Your dog doesn’t understand verbal language. If your dog is doing something that you don’t like, first of all please remember that it’s a dog and they really don’t know your expectations of them. A dog will do dog behavior because they are a dog. Instead of screaming, ask your dog to do something else that you approve of. Redirect the dog. Under no circumstance should you physically harm your dog. That is abuse. You will not gain their trust because they never know when you will be kind or violent towards them. If you had an abuser, would you fully trust them?

• Listen to your dog. Familiarize yourself with dog body language. Our dogs do talk to us. They have all kinds of body language. They let us know when they want us to back off, when they are uncomfortable, when they want to play, etc. Communication is important in all relationships, it isn’t any different with our dogs. As a side note: if your dog growls at you or anyone else, please don’t punish the dog. Instead listen to them. Stop what you are doing to upset the dog and back away. If you think about it, it’s actually the dog’s way of saying, “please don’t do that.” If we tell them that they can’t nicely tell us not to do something then we are looking for a more aggressive way of having them tell us.

If your dog has behaviors that you would like to modify, contact a certified trainer. It is important to ask the following questions of the trainer before you hire them.

1. What exactly will happen to my dog when they get it right?

2. What exactly will happen to my dog when they get it wrong?

3. Are there any less invasive alternatives to what you propose?

By asking the above questions you will find a trainer that won’t harm the trust that your dog has in you. Dog training is an unregulated and unlicensed industry so please be your dog’s advocate.

Most importantly, trusting relationships are happy and rewarding relationships.